I know it’s late, but I figure if I don’t let my thoughts out on paper, my mind will not stop pacing, and my thoughts will not subside. Here it goes;
Recently, one of my friends, who shall remain unnamed, mentioned to me how hard it is to be satisfied simply in Christ. He was going on about how easy it is to simply seek worldly things, whether it was the immediate comfort of another companion or an activities that we partake in to distract ourselves from the ongoing chaos of our lives. Life isn’t simple. I even feel guilty talking about this when, in a world away, there are people who are battling tragic natural disasters and suffering from real problems. Being satisfied in God; it’s a really easy conclusive concept, isn’t it? But, of course, like all things spiritual and Godly, hard to live out.
My friend reminded me a lot of how I handle the relationships I have, or at least one in particular that I have had trouble maintaining (not the friend who reminded me of the other friend). Here’s the backdrop: I really enjoy spending time with this other person, and I think that he and I click very well and enjoy the company of one another. The only thing is, this beneficial fellowship that we have isn’t consistent. One moment, everything is going perfectly fine, and then another minute later, my hourglass has been flipped upside down. If our relationship represented a person’s circadian rhythm, that person would never get any sleep due to the confusion in their psychological and biochemical processes. I don’t particularly know why it is so hard to get along with him, but I do know that this is a friendship worth pursuing. I have to question whether or not this is a relationship that Jesus wants me to pursue. The way things have been going, the chaos will never subside. This isn’t one person’s fault; relationships are two-way streets. Reflecting on this friendship reminds me that I can get caught up in something so simple. This relationship may or may not be there in a year, but I know the marriage I have to Christ will never subside. That’s the important part right? Focus on Him, and make His heart your own? I think I’m getting better at the latter. I think things are changing within me and the process will be continually slow.
Another thing I have to realize is I must stop expecting others to ask how I’m doing. Stop expecting people to minister to me, whether through prayer or comfort. I guess this is an important step for myself in order to shed some dependence. Chances are they don’t care or unaware, but it’s ok. Haha I don’t intend for this to come off negatively or apathetic. Depending on God in Your Life’s Daily Journey.
7 “But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. 8 He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”
So, get closer to him, or get closer to Him? Get by this relationship, or get to God?